Do you ever feel like telling someone, “I’m not saying that I’m right, but can you just agree with me?” I feel this all the time! Especially when I’m arguing with Mr. Man, but that’s a whole other story! So, the other day I took Buddy Bear in for his immunizations / well-baby check-up with the public health nurse. Pretty normal for us, the nurse always gives me a slant-eyed look to see if I’m lying about post-partum depression, (I’m not! FYI, if I was depressed I probably would be in bed eating Oreos instead of letting you poke my baby with 3, 3! needles) I rattle off my concern of the week, the nurse says “yes, your baby is normal’ she stabs him in the leg a couple of times, Buddy Bear screams and I cry, end of story.
However, this time the nurse decided to ask me THE Question, the one that I squirm around each and every time I hear it, “So how’s your baby sleeping?” You see the reason this question is so hard for me is because as Buddy Bear has gotten older, his sleeping habits have gotten worse not better. At 2 months of age he was sleeping in his bassinet for 4-6 hours in a stretch, at 4 months he was sleeping in 3 hour segments and half the time he was in our bed, now at 6 months of age he sleeps for about 30 minutes to an hour at a time and he is almost consistently in our bed. Mr. Man and I now drag ourselves around like the walking dead, repeating this conversation on a regular basis:
“Did you think parenting would be this exhausting?”
“No, we should try something to help him sleep.”
“Yeah, but I’m too tired to try tonight, we’ll start tomorrow, k?”
So, when the nurse asked how Buddy Bear was sleeping I figured I may as well see if she could give us a lead on how to help him (and us) sleep a little better. It went a little like this:
Nurse: “Just let him cry it out”
Andg: “Yeah, we don’t really agree with that approach.”
Nurse: “Well, that’s what you have to do. You better do it now, otherwise he’ll never sleep through the night.”
Andg: “Well, crying it out isn’t good for him and I couldn’t handle hearing my baby, MY BABY! cry for 2 hours and not help him.”
Nurse: “Just put some earphones on so you can’t hear him.”
Grrr… I know that there are lots of ideas and theories on how to get your baby to sleep. I’m not saying that how we have decided to parent Buddy Bear is the only way, but it is what we have decided to do. For goodness sakes, can you just support me?!? *phew* I’ve been holding that in for awhile.
I think that is one of my greatest needs as a mommy, for someone(s) to come alongside me and say, “Yeah, I hear what you’re saying. You’re doing the best you can with what you have.” Not “Let me cram my ideology and theories down your throat.” Or even better “Let’s walk together as we figure out what works best for YOU and YOUR family.”
This is part of why Penny and I love being a part of And Me, Mommy because its a place where we can get together with other mommies and mommy-type people and say to each other “You can do this, we can help.”
What do you feel is one of your greatest needs as a mommy?
Leave a comment